NEW YORK - What works for one Gibson should work for another. At least that's what former teen sensation Debbie Gibson thought Tuesday night when she was pulled over by local police for a broken tail light. "She seemed real nice at first," claims officer Dan McFeeley of the Suffolk County Police Department, "but when she found out she wasn't getting a ticket, she suddenly got upset for some reason." McFeeley claims the names were pretty childish at first... fatso, doodie head, and nincompoop were all mentioned. "When she hit me with 'Jew Bag', I knew things had gone too far".

Officials seem to think it was all a publicity stunt, spurred by the recent arrest of master thespian Mel Gibson, after a minor traffic incident turned into an Anti-Semitic tirade. The subsequent ballyhoo over said arrest may have given Ms. Gibson, who prefers the name Deborah these days, some misguided notions on how to return to the spotlight she once enjoyed. Debbie's publicist released an official statement to the contrary. "Ms. Gibson's comments to the officer were simply taken out of context. In fact, the term 'Jew Bag' is actually a compliment in many cultures... including parts of the Mid-West and Sicily", claims the publicist. Attempts to contact the Mid-West and Sicily for confirmation were unsuccessful as of press time.

To further complicate matters, an online purse company, www.jewbag.biz, is thinking of suing. "We don't need anymore headaches", claims Jewbag founder Rosalia Matteo, referring to unwanted publicity over last year's waterproof backpack, "The Wet Back".

The former pop princess is reportedly sick over the controversy. "I haven't been this embarrassed since my hit song 'Lost in your Eyes', available on my new greatest hits CD from Atlantic Records, was knocked out of the number one Billboard spot by Mike and the Mechanics 'The Living Years'." Attempts to contact Mike or the Mechanics were unsuccessful as of press time.