HOLLYWOOD - In 2004, Hilton fortune heiress Paris Hilton successfully trademarked her name, and the saying "That's Hott"; planning to adorn T-shirts and other items with the newly copyrighted phrases. However, one wonders what she was thinking when, at the same time, she also decided to copyright her vagina. Regardless of the initial intent, the strategy appears to have backfired with a Federal Judge's ruling yesterday that Ms. Hilton's poke hole is now public domain.

Experts agree that Ms. Hilton presumably applied for a copyright on her afro clam to prevent the general public from using it wantonly. However, the law states that once a copyright is applied for and granted, the holder must enforce it. According to reports, a number of gentlemen have stepped forward claiming that not only wasn't the copyright enforced, they were encouraged to violate the copyrighted cock socket repeatedly. "As of 10:00AM this morning," stated the Honorable Judge Frank Lisetti, "I deem Paris Whitney Hilton's poonani to be free for use to the public."

Since early this morning, opportunists have been lining up outside Ms. Hilton's penthouse apartment waiting for a chance to visit her Hairy Godmother. According to public domain records, Ms. Hilton's pinkly stinkly is quickly becoming the most sought after public domain property, already surpassing the popular tune "Shoo, Fly Don't Bother Me", and coming in a close second to Ed Wood's famous film "Plan Nine From Outer Space."